All parents want to see their kids succeed. And often, with the best intention, parents push their children too far that it affects latter motivation to move further. This happens a lot among kids that are into sports. As they grow older, they are highly likely to resist pushiness from their parents. And you don’t want that to happen to your child.
There are ways that you can motivate your kid without being too pushy. Since parents want to see the results fast, it will be quite a challenge on parents since you need to have a lot of patience until you see the results from your child – which they are already motivated to get into sports again.
Make sure you ask the right question after their games or practices. Remember – it is a question – meaning only one question should be asked. Don’t bombard your kid with a lot of questions as it will only irritate them and it will motivate them less about their sport. This is being pushy again. By asking them one question, it will tell them that you are showing interest. It also gives them the chance to say as little or as much as they want. This tells them that you care and that you want to know how they are fairing with the game.
Try to offer opportunities for your child to work outside their practice. Again – it is an offer, not a command or to push them into it. Only wait for their signal if they are willing to do it. If they say no, then don’t push more and drop it. You can bring up your offer another time when they show or express that desire of improving their skills.
It is highly recommended that you attend as many games as you can that your child is participating in. It is understandable that you can’t be there all the time, especially when you have a busy schedule. But the more you are present at almost every game that your child is in, the more you can communicate and show your support to him. Seeing your presence will push your child to work and do his best in his game.
Take notice and offer a casual praise for every hard work he has done. You might be too excited that your child is pushing himself and working hard. However, you need to keep grounded, especially when you are talking with adolescents.
If you are too effusive with your praises, he might be annoyed or embarrassed, or when they are on the contrary years, he might think that he doesn’t need to work too hard when he pleases you too much.
A very simple “nice job” will do, or say that you liked the way they played aggressively in one game. As long as short, concise and cool statements are coming out from you, you will be able to communicate your interest and support without sounding that your approval and love is attached to his performance.
Leave it to his own pace in basking in the glory and enjoy the games, games won and the points he scored. Your responsibility is to reinforce that he worked hard and that it is paying off. When your child sees that their hard work is paid off, they are more to push themselves, without getting much help from you.
Keep in mind that there is no exact age that your child will start pushing himself. It varies from one athlete to another.